David's Success Story
David’s Executive ADHD Success Story
David felt lucky to have his executive position in a large European firm.
He said it all looked so impressive on the outside! But on the inside, he was one failed project away from revealing just how lost he felt.
David had been diagnosed with ADHD when he was 41. When we met two years later, he was still unclear about how ADHD was working in his life. But he knew he needed to do something to feel better about himself.
David described his life as ‘choppy waters’. He felt like he was in a rudderless boat. No direction. No meaning. No ability to steer any kind of useful course.
David didn’t plan. He said ‘yes’ impulsively to avoid disappointing people, and he allowed distractions to direct his focus. He was verbally impulsive, a regrettable trait in a corporate setting. He procrastinated daily and forgot – just about everything.
He struggled ‘mightily’ to enjoy his work. Like many executives with ADHD, David wondered if changing his job would help him perform better. He felt lost. He feared he’d never measure up.
David’s Primary Coaching Goal
Ultimately, David decided he wanted to become a ‘finisher’. He wanted to be seen as someone who does what he says he’ll do. To be reliable. Consistent. He wanted to be ‘true to his word’.
Our Approach
Together, we focused on understanding how ADHD was contributing to his choices. There was the lack of inhibition (to slow himself down), time blindness (which prevented him from planning), and weak working memory (which led to being forgetful).
We also paid close attention to how he worked with time – or not. David played with new ways of organizing his time, especially with tasks that were boring or had several steps to them.
David also did a deeper dive into himself and the beliefs he held that kept him from acting with agency. He had never been happy in his life, and he couldn’t truly believe happiness was even possible! Nothing had changed so far, so why should he expect anything different?
We needed to address David’s judgments about himself. His punitive thoughts stopped him from making changes. He’d say, “Even elementary school students know how to manage time!”
A practice of self-compassion, spiritual support, and accurate knowledge about the complexity of executive dysfunction in ADHD created a deep shift inside of him. When he began to see that he was succeeding by changing how he managed time, these judgments gave way to a more accurate sense of identity: he was a learner!
He and Time could meet each other and create magic.
The Turning Point
He deeply allowed that for him, living with ADHD was difficult. He embraced the idea that he would need to be strategic in a mindful way to create what he wanted. He gave up resisting.
David’s acceptance made room for the fact that he was not defined by ADHD. He was a human being with agency – even with ADHD.
David’s Big Win
David had built a rudder to steer his own course. He was no longer adrift.
He no longer defined himself by his ‘failures’. He defined himself by his ability to be intentional.
He took active steps toward a promotion that he had not moved toward before. And guess what? He got the promotion!
David had become a ‘finisher’. He slowed down at work and was intentional about what he said “yes” to. He took on less, but finished more. And on time.
At home, David was more reliable and communicated clearly with his wife about what he could or couldn’t do. He told me that it felt like she was moving closer to him, as if “she feels safer” inside the relationship.
David had become a man who was true to his word. He described himself as “more whole and put together” than when we first met.
He liked himself.
Best of all, after our first six months together, he shared that “I am most surprised that I could feel this much joy and hope!”
For the first time – ever.
It all starts with a conversation. Tell me your story and what’s on your mind.
Hear my voice and we’ll take it from there.
